Dirty and neat. Just how we like it.
Plus: new podcast drop!!
Three things we love:
Playing with our food (in a totally PG-13 way)
Working with our hands (just to remind u we’re #bourgeoise)
Arbitrary theorems we’ve devoted our limited, but highly specific, expertise to solving
That’s why we set out to answer the age-old question, a riddle fit for Mme Sphinx herself: what’s the sexiest, but least ~pick-me~, cocktail in the galaxy?!?!?
We know, it’s kept you up at night, too. Inspired beads of sweat en route to the bah (British). So we gave it the level of thought it deserves, Model UN-tween level. We debated whether it was a tequila-based drink (too overt!) or vodka-infused (desperate!), or perhaps a spritz (never!). The sexiest-but-least-pick-me (“SBLPM”) cocktail needed to be herby and floral, grounded and earthy, with just a fruity dash of realistic, time-tuning bitterness to be truly worthy of the SBLPM title.
What did we settle on?! After a warring exchange of voice memos (hear for yourself), we decided the SBLPM cocktail is…dun-duh-da-dun *bar spoon drumroll* …the negroni! Sophisticated yet easy. Classic yet complex. A harbinger of taste without surplus surprises. Beloved by Stan Tucci, the extremely SBLPM-ILF bespectacled bald man himself. With equal parts gin, campari, and red vermouth—no shaking required—it’s memorable and fast ((title of our sex tape. No really.)). And ((*cue voice of God that’s really just Ina Garten)) who wouldn’t want that???
So, whisk one (or a whole carafe) up for yourself, add a citrus twist, and strip down to your listening undies while you escape into our latest episode of Stripped.
Sending love, on the rocks,
E+I
Introducing…Stripped, A Podcast, S6E4
What’s the sexiest drink order for a stylin’ first date?
In this drizzly new ep, Isabel and Emma strut their lit major stuff by psychoanalyzing different cocktails, debating the relative hotness of a premixed hurricane, for example, versus a highly sippable, low-alc americano. Both hosts share bad (but, like, good for the plot?!?) first-date sippers and offer truly scientific, unsolicited advice on the sexiest (but, like, not in a pick-me way?!?) bevvy for all the soulmate-searching (or just good-time-seeking) bar-flockers out there. Because if you can’t judge a suitor by their drink order, then what’s a single glitzy guzzler to do?!?
The SexyButNotTooPickMe Negroni
A recipe
Equal parts gin (any), sweet vermouth (any), Campari (pronounced: cumpari. no substitutions). Ice (many) in a vessel (any). Stir. Pour in a short, stout (read: rocks) glass/empty candle/solo cup with one confident cube. Put the orange zest down, none of that. Don’t even think about getting fancy.
The Hot to Try and Hot to Say Dirty Negroni
Yet another recipe
Okay, here comes the elbow grease. Or, olive grease. This recipe is best if you started it yesterday, by combining 2 oz. of your precious olive oil with a big ol’ [750ml] bottle of gin. Apparently Aviation, but we’re not sponsored so we don’t care. Mix them together and freeze overnight. Then follow steps for the SBNTPM Negroni, changing nothing. Unless you really want to get into this, in which case who are we to say don’t add 3 dashes of olive bitters and 3 dashes of saline solution. Yum!
VIBE RATER
SEND NOODS
Follow @strippedpod.bsky.social for weekly nudes.